IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Nowadays, people are consuming more and more sugar-based drinks. Why do they do so? Suggest measures to solve this problem

#people #drinks #measures
There is no doubt that sugar-based drinks have a detrimental effect on human health. Our society in the present are consuming these drinks heavily for many reasons like advertisement campaigns on televisions and its stimulating taste. Governments can take some actions to reduce
this
 consumption by their people like announcing a health campaign and advise the companies to decline the percentage of sugar in these drinks. On the one hand, the people started to surge in consuming sugar-based drinks without stops or knowing
this
 effect on our life. People drunk a sugar-based drinks heavily due to advertisement campaign, which shows every minute on it.v., and the producing companies are sponsored for most well-known events on it.v.
For example
, celebrated football players and actors are announcing that they drink these drinks every day,
although
 these drinks help them to reach to win and success. If the advertisement movement for these drinks restricted by governments, the percentage of usage for these drinks would decline gradually.
On the other hand
, some measures should be followed to decrease the trend of using these drinks. Governments can start to announce for strength, movement, and show the side effect of a carbohydrate drink in infected by many critical diseases.
For instance
, the over-usage of drinking will lead to overweight, high carbohydrate concentration of blood and non-normal blood pressure. Did the government forced the production companies to replace or reduce carbohydrate to be the based on these drinks, People would save from many of critical diseases, which lead in many times to the death. To Sum up, the sugar-based drinks reaction dramatically on the human strength. The consumption of these drinks surged, while the government should take effective measures in order to reduce the usage of sugar-based drinks from people.
Submitted by Abdelrhman Nasser on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: