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Band 7

Some think they can use as much fresh water as they want, but others say governments should limit water use because it is not endless. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#think #water #governments #limit
Some people argue that they can consume
water
 freely,
while
 others contend to launch governmental schemes to impose caps on using
water
 as they are not infinite.
This
 essay will discuss both views and suggest my perspective. On the one hand, proponents of using
water
 without restrictions think that
water
 is bountiful. To be specific, a myriad of lakes and rivers all around the world are the evidence.
For instance
, the Han River provides a large amount of fresh
water
 to Seoul citizens.
Moreover
, as technology has advanced significantly,
water
 can be recycled effectively and quickly through the newest
water
 purification system.
On the other hand
, critics believe that governmental rules are required as
water
 is insufficient.
Water
 seems to be bountiful, but when it comes to 'fresh’
water
, it is not the case, particularly for developing countries. It is true that a lot of undeveloped countries are struggling with the
water
 shortage.
For example
, the population in Africa has surged in recent years
due to
 severe
water
 contamination.
Furthermore
, many experts comment that
this
 issue will
also
 emerge in neighbouring countries within a decade. In my view, the
water
 pollution problem is indeed serious and
thus
, authorities should control the amount of
water
 that can be used by the public.
However
, not only political rules but
also
 promotions conducted by local communities can be favourable to alleviate the issue. To illustrate, advertising a specific catchphrase
such
 as "The less you use, the clearer our nature becomes" can be a driving force for people overconsuming
water
. In conclusion, some people believe that they have the freedom to use
water
while
 others say that
water
 is not an endless resource and
therefore
, it should be restricted by governments. I think that
water
 is not plentiful so not only restrictions but
also
 community promotions are essential.
Submitted by aahhyu111 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that all points made are fully developed and elaborated upon. Some areas, particularly in discussing the opinions and your own perspective, need more depth in explanation and justification.
Task Achievement
Strive to offer more specific examples to strengthen the argument. The current examples are relevant but could be detailed further to clearly illustrate the points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a logical flow throughout the essay. The transition between paragraphs and ideas is generally good, but could be improved for smoother reading. Consider using more varied transition phrases.
Coherence and Cohesion
Revisit the introduction and conclusion to ensure they not only present and wrap up the main points but also reflect a strong, clear stance on the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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