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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that the best way to solve environmental problem is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #cost #fuel
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In recent decades, environmental issues
has never failed
Suggestion
had never failed
 to draw
public’s attention
Suggestion
the public’s attention
. Some people stated that a rise in
cost
Suggestion
the cost
 of
fuel
 is the only way to improve
this
 problem. From my perspective, increasing in petrol price may be reasonable to some extent;
however
,
this
 solution remains several drawbacks. On the one hand, setting a higher cost for
fuel
 will be beneficial in some aspects of alleviating severe pollution problems nowadays.
Firstly
, the rate of air pollution will improve significantly as the amount of carbon emission decreases. Since people are restricted to
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 by vehicles, they would commute on foot or by bicycles more often, which, in turn, reduces a considerable amount of carbon footprint released per day.
Secondly
, the solution
also
 assists in preventing the dramatic degradation of renewable resources. As less
fuel
 is consumed, the frequency of exploitation of natural resources will gradually lessen over time, allowing them to renew faster.
On the other hand
, there will doubtlessly
occurs
Suggestion
occur
 some problems when establishing
fuel
 price escalation. It is evident that the decline in petrol consumption will result in a loss of profit for
petroleum industry
Suggestion
the petroleum industry
. As the number of
fuel
 consumers decreases, it will be a daunting task for companies to maintain due to the lack of operating expenditure; some may even undergo bankruptcy.
Moreover
, higher costs of
fuel
 may bring about shrinkage in daily expenses for people, especially those who accommodate in rural areas.
Consequently
, they will have to cut down on the money spared for other basic needs;
hence
, their life standard may be negatively impacted. In conclusion,
concerns
Suggestion
the concerns
on
Suggestion
of
about
 the surrounding environment can be mitigated by increasing
price
Suggestion
the price
 of petrol;
nevertheless
, some existing disadvantages should be taken into great consideration for the sake of a
balance society
Suggestion
balance in society
.
Submitted by Lâm Hy Lãnh Quyên on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • emissions
  • alternative energy
  • conservation
  • mitigate
  • renewable energy technologies
  • affordability
  • collective action
  • innovation in energy efficiency
  • global cooperation
  • environmental measures
  • pollution
  • economic disparity
  • revenue
  • sustainable development
  • environmental sustainability
What to do next:
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