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Writing Samples /
Band 7

‘The key to reducing crime is to have more police patrolling the streets.’ How far do you support this proposal? What other ways of reducing crime may be effective?

#‘the #crime #police #streets #support
We are all concerned about high crime levels and possible ways to reduce crime, especially in cities. The idea of having high numbers of visible
police
 officers may be
initially
 appealing, but some analysis will show that it is not the key method and that other options are preferable.
Firstly
, we should ask what the purpose of extra detective in public would be. It is probably true that
this
 tactic would reduce minor wrongdoing,
such
 as littering and unsocial behaviour, but determined criminals
such
 as thieves and muggers will inevitably find ways to operate despite the law enforcement presence. The example of New York shows that
police
 patrols
initially
 reduce the violation to some extent, but chaos,
then
 levels off and persists at the lower rate, no matter how many more
police
 are added.
Secondly
, it must be said that many crimes which worry the public today,
such
 as identity theft or financial hacking and fraud, are not carried out on the streets and
thus
 would be invisible to force patrols anyway.
This
 means there is a danger that we would be responding to a current threat with an outdated tactic. Turning to possible alternatives, probably the most effective would be to improve the efficiency of existing
police
 rather than increase their numbers,
for instance
 by better training in computer-based misdeed.
This
 would generate improved rates of detection of crimes and more efficient use of the vast amount of technology available. Another viable option would be to increase penalties for criminals, which would have the benefit of deterring them from committing crime at all. Both these alternatives would be comparatively cheap, and would address the root of the problem rather than seeking to suppress the symptoms. Overall, we have seen that increased patrols are of limited effectiveness because they are superficial in nature. Better training and stronger sentencing would appear to be far more robust alternatives these days.
Submitted by varsha on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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