Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment compete with the younger people for the same jobs. What problems this causes? What are solutions?
It is true that the
competitions
in the same occupation between the elderly and the younger Fix the agreement mistake
competition
witness
a gradual increase. Several problems have resulted from Replace the word
witnessed
this
tendency and they should be tackled by a number of effective solutions. As more and more older people
who need employment compete with the
younger Correct article usage
apply
people
, several related problems can be anticipated. Firstly
, this
phenomenon could create more challenges for the young to find an appropriate job. As a result
, their countries would increase Add an article
the unemployed
unemployed
rate Replace the word
unemployment
and
among Correct word choice
apply
young
population, which could trigger criminal acts. Add an article
the young
Secondly
, the competition could cause various negative effects on young people
who lose in the competition with senior citizens. For example, they would feel useless if they cannot have the competence as their competitor to undertake the position, which may lead to demotivate. Fortunately, several measures could be taken to prevent those problems. The first solution would be the
government should reduce Change preposition
for the
retirement
age. Add an article
the retirement
According to
this
, there would be less
old individuals seeking Correct quantifier usage
fewer
or
jobs which might minimize the competition between youngsters and the old. Correct word choice
apply
Additionally
, governments should create good conditions to encourage companies to expand their scale. As a result
, they could develop the labor
market in their countries to make it easier for individuals to find a job. In conclusion, Change the spelling
labour
it is clear that
there are various negative consequences of competing between older people
and the younger and steps need to be taken to tackle this
problem.Submitted by Ha Tran on
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion