Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others, however, disagree and say that music is merely a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.

#people #music #role #society #form #entertainment

It is true that rich variety of

music

style

Suggestion

styles

can be found all around the world.

Music

has to play an important

role

society

on the other hand

also

brings enter

entertainment

to people. So

this

essay would discuss both the views of people.

music

Suggestion

Music

is something that helps to solve various problem in the

society

. It plays a major

role

in bringing people of different culture together. As by listening

music

people develop

feeling

Suggestion

a feeling

the feeling

feelings

of brotherhood. It

also

helps to resolve various ongoing

conflict

Suggestion

conflicts

in the

society

. It

also

helps to reduce stress, depression and other health problems in the

society

music

source

Suggestion

a source

the source

of medicine to many mental health problems. It

also reduce

Suggestion

also reduces

has also reduced

anger among the people through which it plays an important

role

in the

society

. Each and every

things

Suggestion

thing

this

world provides

entertainment

in some or the other way to people.

Music

also

a source of

entertainment

Suggestion

for

many people. By listening to the

music

many people become happy and start enjoying

there

of them or themselves

their

surrondings

the environmental condition

surroundings

things. That’s why in many

function

Suggestion

functions

like marriage, birthday

celebration etc.

Suggestion

celebration, etc.

there

Suggestion

There

is presence of DJ’s as it makes the environment happy and

enjoyfull

. Whenever a person is nervous or is in

stressfull

extremely irritating to the nerves

stressful

condition than in that situation they prefer to listen

music

as it entertains them and help them to recover from

such

situation. Many

music

composer

Suggestion

composers

compose

music

just for the

entertainment

of the people. To sum up,

music

has both the elements present in it as it can play an important

role

in the

society

and it can

also

entertainment

Suggestion

entertain

the people at the same time. So

music

is considered to be an important part of life.

Submitted by rajat mangukiya on Fri Jun 12 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

283 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others, however, disagree and say that music is merely a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries people increasingly talk about money (how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations). Why? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some college freshmen find that the courses they choose are not suitable for them. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve the problem?

More and more people are choosing to eat healthy food and exercise regularly? Why? What can we do to encourage this?

Some people believe that sport is an essential part of school life for children, while others feel it should be purely optional. Discuss these opposing views and give your own opinion.