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Band 7

Some says that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others To what extent do you agree or disagree

#opportunity
It is true that some people have a perspective about being wealthy has the chance to help others. I strongly agree with
this
 point of view that a needy person can be supported by rich one. There are a lot of things which can be done.
To begin
 with, rich people can help poor persons by doing some charity works. It will provide them vital necessities of life.
Furthermore
, with the help of charity they can extend their support to their family.
For example
, it will give an opportunity to kids who do not have access to education.
As a result
, it will decrease unemployment numbers due to lack of education.
Besides
, charity will motivate them finding jobs and work hard in order to make their life more convenient.
In addition
, individuals who are living with welfare, have the ability to run any kind of business. With the construction of company or even shopping mall they can help poor people get a job.
Consequently
, it will help them to improve their overall lifestyle as well as encourage them to be helpful
instead
 of being useless to society.
For instance
, building a factory, it will definitely generate a variety of jobs, not only during the construction, but
also
 after completion.
Additionally
, business will help needy people have jobs,
hence
 it will make the owner more richer so they can help
further
. To sum up, wealthy people have the best chance to help others and I believe it will provide them a sense of fulfilment when they make someone's life better.
Submitted by Shaghayegh on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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