IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe charity organizations should only offer help to people of their own countries. Others claim that these organizations should give aid to people in great need wherever they live. Discuss both opinions and tell which side do you agree?

People have different opinions about whether the approach of
charity
Use synonyms
organisations
Use synonyms
 ought to be limited to their own nation or to all over the globe where there is a need. While, there are some benefits of working in a particular
country
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, I believe that there should be no boundaries to lend a helping hand to the people in need. On the one hand when
charity
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 foundations work in their own nation, it becomes possible to execute the plans more precisely and accurately on the ground level. Because there are
more number
Suggestion
a number
number
 of workers who are connected to
such
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organisations
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 in the different parts of the
country
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 and can help more needy people.There are so many
such
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organisations
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 working in my
country
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, India, like being human by Salman Khan, you we can by former cricketer Yuvraj Singh, Khalsa foundation. You we can foundation,
for instance
Linking Words
, works in India, they help the cancer patients who cannot afford treatment and other medical facilities. According to a report
this
Linking Words
 foundation has helped around 20,000 patients in India.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
it is more precise and fruitful for
charity
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organisations
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 to work within the
country
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, for the sake of humanity,
charity
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organisations
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 should help people in need regardless of their
country
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. As there are no
such
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organisations
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 in many of the underdeveloped nations and people in
such
Linking Words
 countries are reeling under hazardous
ailments
violent or severe weather (viewed as caused by the action of the four elements)
elements
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when
Use synonyms
charity
Suggestion
charitable
 foundations
works
Suggestion
work
 in other parts of the globe, it spreads
positive message
Suggestion
a positive message
the positive message
positive messages
 among the people and helps to strengthen the bond with other countries.
For example
Linking Words
, when
tsunami
Suggestion
the tsunami
 hit in the countries like Indonesia,
whole world
Suggestion
the whole world
 came together to help and donated money, food packages, medical equipment. These things
unites
Suggestion
unite
 the whole world. Obviously,
charity
Use synonyms
organisations
Use synonyms
 should offer help to people in every nook and corner of the world. In Conclusion, it is more practical when
charity
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organisations
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works
Suggestion
work
 within the
country
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, as humanitarian, every possible help should be provided to the people in need wherever they live

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • charity organizations
  • help
  • people in their own countries
  • people in need
  • nationality
  • global solidarity
  • root causes
  • poverty
  • inequality
  • local community
  • international aid
  • balance
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