IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that the development of technology helps to reduce crime, while other people think it encourages crime. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #development #technology #crime
The question on whether the development of modern, innovative technology has helped to reduce the crime rate or enhanced its incidence has always been debated. There are valid arguments for either side,
however in
Accept comma addition
however, in
 my own perspective, I agree with the notion of the use of modern technology to curb the crime occurrence. On the one hand, the usage of technology driven devices by various departments
such
 as the police force, defence sector, and investigation bureau has eased the process of investigating the cases in a shorter duration and
thus
, helps in early solving the cases by declaring the culprit with all the evidences. In fact,
this
 has developed the feeling of fearfulness among the offenders and prevents them from wrongdoings.
Additionally
, the CCTV cameras, alcohol level detectors, lie detectors, security and burglar alarms have
further
 helped in declining the minor and major crimes.
Moreover
, the recordings of these cameras which are used as the source of evidences can be replayed multiple times, shared readily with other departments, and stored for an infinite period of time. In some cases, it carries more importance as the witness can change his statement during any period of investigating time.
On the other hand
, the rise in cybercrime and cyber bullying is trending in the growing world of globalization and digitization.
For instance
, the higher number of incidents related to hacking the confidential data, illegal money transfers, blackmailing, and security issues are reported in comparison to the past numbers.
Moreover
, the hidden cameras are used to record the confidential business deals and personal moments, and
thus
 contributing to the delinquency. To recapitulate, I opine that regardless of few negative effects, the modern devices have supported the different security forces to control the mischievous acts and provide a speedy investigation process to the judiciary of the country.
Submitted by Man Kaur on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: