A growing number of people feel that animals shouldnot be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Opinions are divided on whether the exploiting animals is mistaken work as they have rights as the humans, or whether people must use them in their needs. I believe that,
although
animals would satisfy people’s needs, it is
also
threat
Suggestion
a threat
the threat
to animals, it causes them to extinction. Animals would satisfy people’s needs in many ways, but especially by giving their meats and by providing labour force. With regard to the former, people who have animals can supply
theirselves
reflexive form of "them"
themselves
and others with the large amount of meat.
For example
, shepherds look after sheep and they can provide service to deliver
sheep
Suggestion
the sheep
to restaurants, cafes. The other major contribution that
animals consider
Accept comma addition
animals, consider
labour force. More specifically, every kind of animals can be used in various
work
Suggestion
works
.
For example
, in Thailand local
people use
Accept comma addition
people, use
elephant to keep heavy things or in Arabic countries camels are used as a transport in deserts.
However
, these benefits a potential cost with regard to extinction of animals. Most people are hunting for
a
Suggestion
an
invaluable part of animals.
For example
, in Africa hunters killed most of the rhinos for their horns. It follows that inhabitants slowly extinct from the world.
In addition
, circuses
are
Suggestion
also play
are also playing
have also played
also
play a role on
this
occasion. For shows people teach them to do various skills. In every repetition animals are hurt which
expection
belief about (or mental picture of) the future
expectation
of
this
would lead to death. In conclusion, even though exploiting animals satisfy people’s needs by providing meat and labour force,
this
action can lead to extinction of animals.
Submitted by Azizbek Bobomurodov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: