IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Environmental problems are serious in many countries. It means that the only possible way to protect the environment is at an international level. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Over the
last
Linking Words
 few decades, the world has seen an increase in environmental
problems
Use synonyms
. Some people believe that we should consider protecting the environment on a global level. In my opinion, I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 suggestion for the disadvantage it brings.
This
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 essay will
Linking Words
firstly
Replace the word
first
show examples
 discuss the drawbacks of considering
this
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 obstacle. One of the principal disadvantages is the
cost-consuming
Check wording
cost-inefficiency
show examples
. To connect and solve
this
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 problem all around the world between several
countries
Use synonyms
, the Government has to link with the other
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 can cost a lot of money to proceed with the work. What is more, it is
also
Linking Words
 about time-wasting.
This
Linking Words
 is because each country has its situation and
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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so
Punctuation problem
, so
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 the most sensible way is to solve the problem
in domestic
Replace the word
domestically
show examples
 by their authorities. The main advantage associated with the international problem is the lack of bond between developed and developing
countries
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. Developed
countries
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 are much wealthier than the
other
Punctuation problem
other,
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 so they have several high-end technologies and methods for water disposal, air pollution.
By contrast
Linking Words
, developing
countries
Use synonyms
 have to face a variety of difficulties which the richer
hard
Verb problem
find hard
show examples
 to understand. If the environmental
problems
Use synonyms
 are the foremost Government’s interest in developing
countries
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 today, the small
countries
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 said it is not the best one to solve because they have other
worryings
Check wording
worries
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, the gap between these
countries
Use synonyms
 can be widened, which
is
Verb problem
makes
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 a
trouble
Check wording
more difficult
show examples
 to solve international
problems
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.
To sum up
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, I disagree with the suggestion that considering environmental
problems
Use synonyms
 at an international level
because it not only
Verb problem
is
show examples
 a waste of time and money
Punctuation problem
, but
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but
Correct word choice
and
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also
Linking Words
 causes some other
problems
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Make sure to develop your main points more and provide clearer examples.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer linking words to connect your ideas effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Make your introduction and conclusion stronger by summarizing your main points clearly.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion on the topic and state it well in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay structure is generally logical, with an introduction, body, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • environment
  • pollution
  • climate
  • change
  • international
  • global
  • cross-border
  • cooperation
  • agreement
  • treaty
  • law
  • policy
  • regulation
  • standard
  • target
  • fund
  • finance
  • technology
  • transfer
  • energy
  • renewable
  • pollutant
  • waste
  • recycle
  • reuse
  • reduce
  • plastic
  • water
  • air
  • soil
  • government
  • business
  • community
  • education
  • awareness
  • monitor
  • measure
  • progress
  • challenge
  • barrier
  • sustainable
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