Do you agree that individuals are responsible for their own happiness or it depends on the factors of the person's life?

#individuals #happiness #factors #person #life

There exists a controversial notion that happiness in

life

is based on materialistic possessions and wealth a person has. According to me, a person is in charge of his own joy and it is connected directly to their personal soul.

This

essay would elucidate the reasons for unhappiness and how can one turn himself positive throughout.

To begin

with, Folks nowadays compares themselves with others based on the possessions they own.

For instance

, people in my society collates others status by measuring their assets like cars, house etc.

Such

an idea makes them unhappy about their stages in

life

and tends tends feel less superior to others.

Furthermore

, Humans are derived from money and luxury.

this

Suggestion

This

demands a stressful

life

where they forget the essence of

life

This

can lead to depression and many other health issues. Happiness is the pursuit of

life

and it doesn't come from owning a particular subject. Any joy obtained from

such

action would fade away after a few days.

Instead

real happiness is created within. An individual should be able to follow his passion and make choices that would create satisfaction in his growth. In my conviction, a person is responsible for his own happiness because he is the one who decides for

himselves

This

can

also

be created with spending quality with your family and loved ones. Staying positive throughout can bring merry into your

life

and make it much easier. In conclusion, I believe Happiness is to be made within. Money and other possessions can't bring pleasure. So live a

life

that is

worth it.

Submitted by jesna tomy on Fri Jun 19 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Do you agree that individuals are responsible for their own happiness or it depends on the factors of the person's life?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Due to increasing world demandings for oil and gas energy, people need to look for a new sources of energy in remote and untouched natural places. DO advantages of locating these sources outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that subjects like science and technology are more important than history today. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.