IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#people #university #work #life #qualifications #development
Youths aiming for higher
education
 are a very common scenario seen now a days.They prefer going to a university since they want to be highly educated.I agree with the above statement,
however there
Accept comma addition
however, there
 are some negative effects for attaining highest qualification.
Education
 is the key to a successful future.Children nowadays are very particular about their
education
.They want to be highly educated from the most reputed colleges so as to get a good job in the future.Traditionally, parents weren'
t
 concerned about the
education
 of their child as they want their lamb to be married as early as possible as they want to shed all the responsibility of their child.Lately
,
Accept space
,
youths are capable enough to arrange the fees for their college or university as they don'
t
 want to be a burden on their parents.Generations don'
t
 want the society to call their parents a poor stigma of the society and
instead
 they tend to work hard to earn a good living.
For example
, youths studying in Canada do part time jobs which are not only a source of income for them, but they can
gain
 self independence and not asking the families to pay the loans for
further
education
.
On the other hand
, some parents married off their children so that at least amount of money could be spent on them.The youths at that time weren'
t
 even aware about the positive effects of
education
 and the job prospects.They were made to do farming, which was the only source of income at that time.Agricultural practices were carried out in the areas where
education
 did not
gain
 much prevalence due to lack of awareness. I would like to conclude my essay by stating that
education
 is the only means by which individuals can
gain
 acceptance in the society.
This
 makes them self reliant and independent in many areas.While
on the other hand
 an uneducated person will always have negative thoughts and an never
gain
 independence economically.
Submitted by jessica dhawan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: