Government should not have to provide care or financial support for elderly people because it is the responsibility of each person to prepare for retirement and support him or herself. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It said that
state
Suggestion
states
the state
should stop helping senior citizens in the term of economy, as they are mature enough to take care on their own. I agree with
this
statement to a large extent and my supporting points will be discussed
further
.
To begin
with, if
this
service
continue
Suggestion
continues
for elder’s by
government
, they would not save
money
for their future and many of them would
left
Suggestion
leave
their job at
early age
Suggestion
an early age
, just to get all the service free of cost from the
government
.
Moreover
,
this
could be affect
Suggestion
could affect
could be affected
to their physical health
also
.
For example
, some private companies like Jindal Diamond LTD.
and
Suggestion
And
Wipro LTD.
are
Suggestion
Are
providing most of the required things for their retired employees, in the result, they take advantage of
this
and take retirement as early as possible.
Furthermore
, looking from the economic perspective, once the
state
started
not to giving
Suggestion
not to give
aid to senior’s, huge amount of
money
saved by
government
which could be
spend
Suggestion
spent
in
growth
Suggestion
the growth
of that
state
.
For instance
, the authority of china announced
this
law, not provide any financial support to
elders
Suggestion
the elders
and they put all those
money
Suggestion
monies
in building new roads and hospitals.
On the contrary
, it cannot be ignored that
government
should support elders after work age is ended because they work for the authority, so that they has to help their employees and those people give
government
taxes, which need to be give them back as a pension
fund
, so they can live
rest
Suggestion
the rest
of their lives without any headache. To sum up, it can be said that despite the fact that elders should provide aid or
fund
from the
state
, my reason that seniors would not save their
money
for their coming days, in order to get those
fund
Suggestion
funds
from the
state
as well as
growth
Suggestion
the growth
of the
state
should use those
fund
Suggestion
funds
for them.
Submitted by Aasim Dabbawala on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial support
  • retirement
  • self-sufficiency
  • government subsidies
  • pension schemes
  • quality of life
  • economic uncertainties
  • inflation
  • dignity
  • personal responsibility
  • publicly funded
  • inadequate preparation
  • social security
  • care provision
  • elderly poverty
  • financial burden
What to do next:
Look at other essays: