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Band 4.5

In today’s world, it’s private companies rather than government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#today’s #world #it’s #companies #government #conduct #research
It is obvious that scientific investigation
used
Add a missing verb
was used
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to invest
Verb problem
apply
show examples
by
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 in the past.
However
, in recent years, there
are
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
 an increasing number of people
suppose
Correct pronoun usage
who suppose
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 that scientific exploration should be carried out and controlled by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
private organizations rather than
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
. From my perspective,
this
 thought brings more positive aspects than negative aspects.
It is clear that
 many people do not trust scientific
research
 when private sources are involved because they are afraid that without
government
 control, some companies could carry out illegal
research
 related to nuclear weapons or unethical human experimentation, and
this
 can pose a serious threat to society.
However
, it is important for the
government
 to manage their activities in order to provide high-quality and reliable results
as well as
 detect immediately many
industry – funded
Correct your spelling
industry–funded
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 projects which have been poorly conducted and intentionally misleading. Meanwhile, it is obvious that private companies bring many benefits.
First,
it is recognizable that scientific
research
need
Change the verb form
needs
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 to be funded by private organizations. One added advantage is having enough human resources and having a vast number of talents who can contribute to scientific
research
, and these people can reduce the expenditure on
workforce
Add an article
the workforce
a workforce
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 to a degree.
Besides
, it helps
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 reduce pressure on national budgets because without sufficient funding, many important scientific projects would be abandoned, and
this
 can
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
 an adverse impact on the development of any nation.
Moreover
, it helps
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
concentrate
to invest
Verb problem
on
show examples
 other important
sections
Correct your spelling
sectors
show examples
such
 as health care and education.
Second,
over the past few decades, there have been many private companies conducting valuable
research
 on various areas
such
 as space exploration or renewable energy sources. In conclusion, private organizations support
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
show examples
 national and
research
 state-of-the-art inventions.
Therefore
, its benefits can
overpowering than
Verb problem
outweigh
show examples
 the drawbacks of itself.
Submitted by Vi Tạ on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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