IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The money spent by governments on space programmes would be better spent on vital public services such as shcools and hospitals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #governments #space #programmes #services #shcools #hospitals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In some countries, the government spends large amounts of money on
space
Use synonyms
 discovery programmes. I totally agree with the idea of allocating that fund on crucial public facilities
instead
Linking Words
. There are several reasons why
space
Use synonyms
 programmes should be discontinued.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is extremely expensive to build a spaceship and the facilities required to support the
space
Use synonyms
 missions, and the training of the scientists and other staffs will
also
Linking Words
 be costly.
Secondly
Linking Words
, these projects do not bring any immediate benefit to the society.
Lastly
Linking Words
, these missions
are
Suggestion
is
 extremely risky which had many failures rather than success, and in my opinion it is not worth the risk. One tragic example is the Challenger
space
Use synonyms
 shuttle incident that took the lives of the astronauts. I strongly believe that the money from the
space
Use synonyms
 programmes should be spent on vital public services
instead
Linking Words
. It is much cheaper to train doctors, teachers, policemen, and other public service workers as compared to train astronauts, scientists and engineers who work on
space
Use synonyms
 exploration projects.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there will be immediate and positive impacts provided by public officers to the life of ordinary people in society.
For example
Linking Words
, we all use schools, hospitals and roads, and we all need the emergency measures provided by the firefighters. If government redistributed the budget spent on the
space
Use synonyms
 travel and research, there would be many people who could be lifted out of poverty or given a better quality of life. In conclusion, I believe that government should spend money on services that benefit us all rather than waste resources on projects that do not improve our everyday lives.
Submitted by kuro on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: