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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #advantage #situation
Nowadays, the running of the birth rate amount keeps rising from day to day. The number of young adults may be higher than the elderly. I
am totally agreed
Suggestion
totally agree
 with the benefits of young people are more than the elderly explains in the following paragraph. We cannot reject that the number of birth rates in each country keeps increasing every day because in
this
 whole world the number of young people is more than half of the elderly. Teenagers or young adults can do anything they want. They are more energetic and productive.
From
Suggestion
Since
For
 I have mentioned above about the increasing birth rate can expand a variety of generations like people said “More human More invention” I admitted it is true because in
this
 huge society humans have been creating a lot
in
Suggestion
of
such
ground-breaking
being or producing something like nothing done or experienced or created before
groundbreaking
 things. Lots of occupations in
this
 world still require an employee who has abilities and skills. Most of the job noted the qualification to hire young adults as well as not accept people whose ages not over 35 years old. In some countries, they
are strictly required
Suggestion
strictly require
 whose ages more than 30 years old. It is a real fact in the career sector.
On the other hand
, the elderly can be living by themselves using their
saving
Suggestion
savings
 or money from
retirement but
Accept comma addition
retirement, but
 a few of them still working as a low skill workers. In conclusion, the rising amount of young people can support the world runs
rapidly
Accept comma addition
rapidly, such
such
 as a career path as well as the opportunities to create new inventions meanwhile a few of the elderly might not active more development. It undoubtedly embodies my opinion perfectly.
Submitted by Datchanee Thasan on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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