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Band 5

City centers are very crowded with cars. They often cause a great deal of pollution. Cars should be banned from all centers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#city #centers #cars #pollution
Every
weekdays
Suggestion
weekday
, I am stuck in traffic during the way to work. It leads one to wonder whether cars should be banned in
city
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
. In my view, despite the lots of cars have made serious pollution, the cars should not be excluded from these areas. One of the shortcomings is that it would be inconvenient. Not all areas can be reached by taking public transportation. Take myself as
example
Suggestion
an example
. I have to go to
city
center
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centre
 for working
by
Suggestion
with
 car, which takes around an hour every weekday.
However
, if I take the MRT and bus to work, I have to spend almost 2 hours.
Therefore
, without cars use
in
particular area
Suggestion
a particular area
, it would be
inconvenience
Suggestion
inconvenient
inconvenienced
. Another reason for not banning car in central areas is
that would
Accept comma addition
that, would
 it be unrealistic. In modern times, more and more commercial activities rely on cars, trucks and other forms of transportation, especially in cities.
As a result
, if all the cars were excluded from
city centers
Suggestion
the city centre
city centre
city centres
, many commercial activities would be stopped. It will cause serious economic consequences,
hence
 no politician will even consider that.
Nevertheless
, It might be claimed that banning cars would reduce pollution.
However
,
this
 argument is unconvincing since the factories and industries which heavily dependent on cars will move to
suburbs
Suggestion
the suburbs
 due to the banning policy in
city
centers
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
centres
.
Therefore
,
this
 policy does not solve any problem, the pollution and emissions still exist. All things considered, denying car access to
city centers
Suggestion
the city centre
city centre
 is clearly unwise. It
can not
can not
cannot
 solve any problem but causes more inconvenience. Meanwhile, it is an unrealistic idea.
Submitted by 莊曉薇 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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