Some people think that competitive sports have positive effects on teenager education, while others argue that effect is negative. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #sports #effects #teenager #education #effect

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Keeping our brain activity plays an important role in our brain development.

Therefore

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, many people, especially teenagers choose to attend many diverse, competitive sports in order to keep fit.

This

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leads to an opinion that their course will benefit positively.

However

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, there is others mentions that the effect might be harmful. I personally think that playing sports is both good and bad, and both views will be discussed in the following paragraphs. Sports classes are always included in every school’s curriculum since students have to learn many hours straight.

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Therefore with

Accept comma addition

Therefore, with

physical education classes, help student release stress, keep them healthy, build confidence, enhance teenager’s cooperation with other kids through teamwork.

In addition

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, competitive sports make student become more competitive not only in a specific sport but

also

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in class, give them more motivation to work harder to achieve better goals.

Furthermore

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, sports can help some potential students realize their ability to be the athlete.

On the other hand

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, many others mention that only academic subjects are needed in school, as the cons it brings.

For instance

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, many people believe that sports as a waste of debate time, as distracted, so as the resulting student might fail in an examination.

Moreover

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, it

also

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has influence on student’s confidence and their competitiveness. Being competitive makes them more eager to win, so if they fail someday, they may collapse and disappointed with the results despite their hard-working. And

finally

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, not everyone is perfect, some of them cannot play or have no interest in sport leads to performance not as good as others. To sum up,

although

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playing sport has negative drawbacks, but we cannot underestimate the beneficial effect it brings. Sports need, including in school as to balance study and playing to help them healthy, well-being and relaxing during their development.

Submitted by ngbntrn 2805 on Tue Jul 07 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
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take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

foster
teamwork
growth mindset
sense of responsibility
manage success and failure
undue pressure
emphasize
winning at all costs
cheating
aggression
physical and emotional burnout
integration
social cohesion
diverse group of peers
encouraging empathy
hyper-competitive
overshadows
joy and love for the game
healthy and enjoyable activity
stressful obligation
means to an end
promote a balanced approach
competition is healthy
sportsmanship
valued above victory

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Some people think that competitive sports have positive effects on teenager education, while others argue that effect is negative. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many of the products we buy nowadays break or wear out very quickly. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this for manufacturers and the public?

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many young people are leaving their home in rural area to study or work in cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh its disadvantages?

Living in large cities today poses many problems for people. What are these problems? Should governments encourage more people to live in smaller town

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.