Some people say that wild animals have no place in the 21st century, and the protection is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often said that there is no space for wild animals in
this
day and age, so it would waste money if we spent money on wildlife conservation. I do not see eye to eye with
this
view. In
this
essay, some rationales to support my conviction will be discussed.
To begin
with, the planet
Earth
is co-possessed by humans and other living creatures, so wild beasts deserve pieces of land for their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Human beings are an animal species like any other four-legged beasts or birds. Of course, they have higher intelligence than other life forms, but it does not mean that they have a right to claim
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
full ownership of the
Earth
.
Moreover
, the population of wildlife is much larger than that of humans. If they could express their ideas, people had to yield more places to them.
Thus
, large enough spaces ought to
be remained
Change to the active voice
remain
have remained
show examples
for undomesticated, animated beings as the
co-owner
Fix the agreement mistake
co-owners
show examples
of
Earth
.
Furthermore
, an investment in the preservation of other life forms will have positive effects on human society in the long term. The ecosystem of
this
planet is complex because all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
living organisms, regardless of their sizes, interact with one another. Provided that one species
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
gone extinct,
then
a knock-on effect on nearby plants or groups of animals is expected, possibly leading to upsetting the ecological system.
Consequently
, humans may suffer from unexpected natural disasters caused by the broken chain.
Therefore
, a halt to the protection of wildlife can mean that it is we who are threatening our future as a species, so the financial support of conserving nature is not a waste of money. In conclusion, animals living in the outback are entitled to take up some
spaces
Fix the agreement mistake
space
show examples
as the
co-owner
Fix the agreement mistake
co-owners
show examples
of the
Earth
, and every penny used for protecting wild beasts is well
worth
Correct pronoun usage
worth it
show examples
.
Submitted by Eul on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that the introduction sets the tone for the essay and clearly states your position on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas by using transition words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: