IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many people believe social networking sites(such as Facebook)have had a huge negative effect on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree ?

#people #sites #facebook #effect #individuals #society
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In the contemporary
word
Correct your spelling
world
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, most
people
Use synonyms
 rely on social media for entertainment , news advertisements and so on . Nowadays ,
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
networking sites have had a great effect
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
personalities and
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 , especially
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
young
Add an article
the young
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 generation . Many
people
Use synonyms
 think that it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 had a major unkind influence on humanity . I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 argument and in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I shall give attractive reasons to prove my point of view. First of all ,
this
Linking Words
 is
way
Add an article
a way
the way
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 of connecting with the
people
Use synonyms
 next door or across the world , with one click . At the moment, we are in quarantine , we can not interact with
people
Use synonyms
 without aid the
social
Change preposition
of social
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 networks .
For example
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 , in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 four
months
Add a comma
months,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
have used
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 these applications
such
Linking Words
 as Facebook and Twitter three times more than
previous
Add an article
the previous
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 period.
Secondly
Linking Words
 , through
this
Linking Words
 communication device
Add a comma
,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 around the world can have
breadth
Add an article
a breadth
the breadth
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 of knowledge . With
help
Correct article usage
the help
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 of
this
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 can be aware
about
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 new information ,
modern
Correct word choice
and modern
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 developments  
such
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 as techniques which may support our easy and convenient life .
For instance
Linking Words
 , assist of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
social media networks
million
Fix the agreement mistake
millions
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 of nations could view advertisements that are
good
Change the article
a good
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 way of
be
Verb problem
becoming
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 familiar
of
Change preposition
with
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technologies ,
such
Linking Words
 as
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
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 mobile phones and know about their quality , prices and so on .
Finally
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 , by
help
Change the form of the verb
helping
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this
Linking Words
systems
Change noun form
system's
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 population notably entrepreneurs have
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 opportunity to widen their business .
And
Correct word choice
This
show examples
this
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 is
useful
Add an article
a useful
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 method of expanding and
make
Wrong verb form
making it
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 more recognizable
this
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 job .
This
Linking Words
 is illustrated by the fact that
million
Correct your spelling
millions
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 of factories , businesses ,
study
Correct word choice
and study
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 centres are
used
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
Linking Words
this techniques
Change the determiner
this technique
these techniques
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more and more . In conclusion ,
although
Linking Words
 it is a common belief that social media networks which are very familiar
over
Correct determiner usage
all over
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 the world have had a minus pressure on both individuals and society . Personally, I believe that
Correct article usage
the
show examples
use of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 connection devices
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 profitable
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
different purposes. (324words ) 17.06.20
Submitted by Fayzullayevaruhshona on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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