Some people think that in the modern society becoming more dependent on each other, while others say that individuals are becoming more independent. Discuss both views and give Your own opinion?

#people #society #individuals

In today’s advanced and dynamic environment, a few people believe that there is an augmenting

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

has been observed in dependence on other people, whereas a few have

this

perception that now they are

more free

Suggestion

freer

and more self reliable. In

this

essay I intend to delve into both views.

However

, in my

opinion I

Accept comma addition

opinion, I

agree with the apprehension that there is an upward trend has been seen where individuals are becoming more dependent. Taking into account the due to advancement in technology which has made has self- sufficient in various

aspect

Suggestion

aspects

. To exemplify it, large number of individuals did not depend on

salesperson

Suggestion

the salesperson

while buying any product online.

Besides

this

, we can sell our product on various online platforms

such

as Flipkart, Amazon and Myntra.

Moreover

, many employers are not dependent on employees as everything can be done with the aid of computers. There is another pivotal aspect which is most preponderant one is that we humans are social animals, who is directly or indirectly dependent on others.

For instance

, even though we are doing online transaction, but we are still dependent on various software developers and internet service providers.

In addition

this

, we

can prepared

Suggestion

can prepare

our own food with the help of packed food which is becoming popular, but we still rely on companies to manufacture it. To conclude,

although

technology has given us boost and convenient in our task,

dependence

Suggestion

depends

on engineers are indeed too dire to ignore.

Submitted by anmol kapoor on Wed Jul 15 2020

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Word Count

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

242 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

interdependence
globalized economy
collaborative work environments
crowd-sourced
empowered
perception
availability
autonomy
reliance
shifted

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Some people think that in the modern society becoming more dependent on each other, while others say that individuals are becoming more independent. Discuss both views and give Your own opinion?

Word Count

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

some believe that government should ban dangerous sports while other argue that there should be freed to do any sports or activity

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There is an increasing trend around the world towards having a small family rather than a large family. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays，young people are admiring media and sports stars, even though they do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?