Some people thinks that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money coukd be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do do agree with this view

#people #government #money #arts #coukd

Although

, few people

thinks

Suggestion

think

that

government

is not spending

money

properly, as they spent

money

arts

Suggestion

the arts

which could be useful in other sectors. While in my opinion

government

is doing the right thing

that is

promoting arts, Arts helps us in many

ways

Accept comma addition

ways, for

for instance

, it

help

Suggestion

helps

humans to become more observant, as well as it helps us to reduce stress.

Firstly

, Arts help us to maximize our brain

activities

Accept comma addition

activities, for

for example

, when we attend arts and sculptures our brain start observing which stimulates the brain activities.

Secondly

, Arts

also

help us to reduce stress

objective form of "I"

.e.

when

Suggestion

When

we visit

museum

Suggestion

museums

the museum

a museum

and explore many historical things we starting to forget out problems and more focused on the items which we are seeing, which is a great activity to reduce stress.

Thirdly

arts

Suggestion

the arts

also

help us to become more and more observant.

Lastly

, Arts makes us

more keen

Suggestion

more keenly

and helping us to grow problem solving skills, as its tune our mind differently and letting us see the other side of the picture. Even though, we have many advantageous things about Arts that we have discussed earlier, minority of the people still thinks that the amount which our state is investing on arts should be spent somewhere else other than arts, like projects related to science and

technology

, they might think that arts is not as important as science and

technology

for them, they may

also

think that arts is old fashioned and lesser people are attracted towards arts and if our

government

makes investment in other sectors which provide future opportunities are more beneficial;

Furthermore

, they thinks that if our state funding

money

on science and

technology

, it will make their life more easy, as

technology

helps them to communicate easily. To conclude

this

Arts helps us to be more focused and increase our problem solving skills and

government

should continue putting

money

of Arts.

Submitted by Hospitality alive on Thu Jul 16 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

314 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people thinks that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money coukd be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do do agree with this view

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some cultures value elderly people more, while other cultures value the youth more. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

Some people say that individuals do to protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now ‘one big traffic jam’ How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

These days more and more people spend their free time doing dangerous activities. Why is this happening? Are there more positive or negative effects to this trend?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+