Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as unemployed and homeless people. Do you agree or disagree.

#people #government #care

Unemployment is the rising concern and the biggest hindrance of the modern world towards success.

Thus

this

is getting a concerned issue that

such

people should get a proper aid from the

government

. I strongly accord with

this

notion that ministry do hold a responsibility in taking care of homeless people. I will discuss the strong points to support my view.

Firstly

, in

this

competitive world, finding a job is as difficult as finding a needle in a haystack as everyone has to go through a cut throat competition.

Moreover it

Accept comma addition

Moreover, it

is a result of wrong

government

policies too, that there are not enough jobs available in the market these days. Which in result could a devastating for any nation as there will a break on the all out development. For an instance, recently India banned all Chinese products which lead to hike in unemployment.

Government

Suggestion

The government

should think of alternatives before taking

such

decisions.

Secondly

, if

government

Suggestion

the government

will not provide jobless people with must needed food and shelter they will tend towards doing crime and looting to meet up with their daily needs.

Similarly in

Accept comma addition

Similarly, in

South Africa, where the crime rate touched the sky due to

such

circumstances.

Furthermore politicians

Accept comma addition

Furthermore, politicians

can bring up enormous policies to create jobs which include foreign direct investments in the nation which could really be a blessing in disguise. Along with a prominent action is much required against corruption if we really want to eradicate the problem from its roots.

Finally

, in conclusion, political parties must do their jobs properly and provide every citizen what their rights are. I strongly believe that if

government

do their part with consideration, there will not be

such

problem and it will be greatly helpful in deterring the stress.

Submitted by Yogesh Sharma on Fri Jul 17 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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