Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

In the contemporary era, most people prefer to socialize online rather than face to face. I believe that,
this
is
negative
Suggestion
a negative development
development
. Some people say
this
is
positive
Suggestion
a positive development
development
while
others argues
Accept comma addition
others, argues
this
brings up negative
development
. I believe that,
this
create
Suggestion
creates
negative
development
on them.
Firstly
, being socialize may end up with
mind
Suggestion
a mind
-illness,
such
as depression, anxiety and so on. Recently, there was an article regarding more than 70% younger people in US having depression because of using social media more than 12 hours/day.
Secondly
, people can not able to identify the real character of
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
unless they meet them personally. In fact,
few days
Suggestion
a few days
back, a couple who got married by
met
Suggestion
meeting
up in online have gotten a divorce within 6 months of marriage.
Furthermore
, people do not know about how to behave in society. If a person who tends to spend on social media rather than going outside meet
someother
Suggestion
some others
some other
in outside, they usually do not know what to talk with them. To support
this
, my uncle's son who tends
to spent
Suggestion
to be spent
their whole day in phone. One day, his father's mother came to home, he did not know what to talk with them.
Moreover
, one
can not
can not
cannot
get all latest news through the social media. Sometimes talking with others personally, they can gain some knowledge, even they can learn something identical from the others. To conclude with,
although
there are a
alot
(often followed by 'of') a large number or amount or extent
lot
of benefits of being
socialize
Suggestion
socialized
, the negative impact of
this
overweighted
usually describes a large person who is fat but has a large frame to carry it
overweight
the positive
development
.
Submitted by vemula pavan on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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