Many people think that too much attention and resources are given to the protection of wild animals and birds? Do you agree or disagree?
It is true that the governments these days are paying excessive attention to the conservation of wildlife.
This
essay agrees with the given information because there is a surplus demand to look for the
other human requirements, and regimes should divert funds to fulfil their needs.
To commence with, in the contemporary world, unarguably, human activities have contributed a lot Correct article usage
apply
in
disturbing the balance of the whole ecosystem.It is clearly evident that biodiversity should be protected.Change preposition
to
However
, the extinction of some species does not leave potential impacts on the existence of life on the planet Earth.For instance
, dinosaurs'
extinction has not had any adverse effects, it merely triggered the survival of mammals to a Correct article usage
the dinosaurs'
little
extent.Correct word choice
small
Thus
, keeping in mind, several factors apart from protecting fauna, intensive steps are required in other directions as well.
Another fact is that the administration should look into providing basic amenities to the general public.Since the development of any nation depends on the progress of its citizens, therefore
funds should be allocated to access Rephrase
apply
the
modern healthcare facilities, employment Correct article usage
apply
to
the youth and a better lifestyle Change preposition
for
to
the masses.Change preposition
for
Although
I certainly favour the protection of the wild creatures, not for the sake of ignoring other essential areas.
In conclusion, it has become a question of debate, whether extreme focus on conserving wild animals and birds, is appropriate or not.I think there are various sectors where governments should concentrate, such
as education, along with
conservation
of biological diversity.Correct article usage
the conservation
Submitted by kajalmaan.16 on
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task response
The essay addresses the prompt but lacks depth in presenting a comprehensive argument. The points raised are not fully developed, and the essay could benefit from a more thorough analysis of the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the essay lacks strong logical connections between ideas. The flow of the essay could be improved by using clearer transitions and structuring the content more effectively.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
