Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology.

#people #technology

Means of communication between people have altered due to

technology

This

modification has a lot of effects on the kinds of relationships among people.

For instance

, it decreases the number of ceremonies and

besides

that, it introduces a new concept named “social friends”. In my opinion,

this

change is a negative development with some drawbacks. After the development of

technology

, some variety of relationships between people took part.

This

alteration decreased people’s interactions with each other. Nowadays, in some families, parents and their children are separate and the only time that they meet each other is the mealtime.

Also there

Accept comma addition

Also, there

is a new friendship that people make on social media. As it is known, social friends are not reliable and sometimes they are dangerous for people. I believe that

technology

modification is the worst thing that happened to humanity.

Although

it helps works and jobs, but it changed considerably the relationships among youngsters. Old people couldn’t adapt to

this

new age, so they are really hurting. A lot of teenagers don’t go to meet their grandparents and

as a result

, it has a lot of emotional effects on elder people. In conclusion,

technology

impacts anybody’s life and it modifies the types of communications that people make.

Furthermore

it has some disadvantages that are really important. Namely, old people are really vulnerable to

this

development. I recommend that there should be a guideline for

technology

that restricts all of its negative impacts.

Submitted by Sina on Thu Jul 30 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

241 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

online marketplaces
mobile payment options
personalized advertising
accessibility
compare prices
decision fatigue
impulse buying
financial imprudence
privacy and data security
transformed
streamlined
user-friendly

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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology.

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

An increasing number of children are overweight which could result many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and healtg care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?

Many people these days rely on traditional medicines rather than going to doctors. What are the causes? Is this a positive or negative development?

It is difficult for people living in cities to get enough physical exercise. What are the causes and what solutions can be taken to solve the problem? (Health)