Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.

#television #children #two #five

One of the targets of

is created to raise interest in a particular age group. When it comes to

for very young children some considerations need to be

done

produced by a manufacturing process

made

and analysed. I personally believe that advertisements built for toddlers are unsafe and should not be aired on

. I feel

this

way for some reasons that I will explain in

this

essay.

First

, at

such

a young age the best influence that a child can have is the one

from

Suggestion

the parents and not from the

. As parents commit to bring up good people and influence them in a positive way,

can get in the way. With a multitude of objects and toys that a child can watch on

, the risk of becoming spoiled is very likely to happen. A compelling

example can

Accept comma addition

example, can

be drawn from my personal experience. My parents were very strict on the use of

and never let me watch it alone. As they were a guide for me to understand what was good and bad, I grew up responsible and not spoiled. A

further

reason is that children are in a very delicate phase when they are so young

therefore

an excessive amount of

can influence their education and behaviour.

ads made for children are attractive, colourful and able to catch their

attention but

Accept comma addition

attention, but

the only purpose is to get the parents to buy it. Children may develop an obsession for objects and behave badly if they do not obtain what they want.

For instance

, as I was working in a toy shop I saw numerous times children misbehave and cry because their parents did not want to buy them a very popular toy that they had seen on

. I saw the same scene

also

if that particular doll or toy was sold out and these kids would be very angry about it. To sum up, children are in a critical moment

for

Suggestion

their development when they are very young and an excessive amount of

can cause problems and shape their personality.

Submitted by sonia on Fri Jul 31 2020

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

350 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.

Your opinion

some people believe that students should be made to have unpaid jobs in their free time.Do you agree or disagree?

International travel has many advantages to both travelers and the country that they visited. Do Advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some countries encourage foreign companies to open in their country. Many people think the government should focus on encouraging local business rather than foreign businesses. To what extent do you agree?

the chart below shows information about subway systems in three major European cities.