IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people believe that use of mobile phones in public is as annoying as smoking and should be banned? Do you agree or disagree?

#people #phones
There is no doubt that
usage
Suggestion
the usage
 of mobiles has been increased in recent years significantly.
Although
 some believe that
this
 can be a public nuisance, others consider
this
 is an essential part of our day to day life. In my opinion, even though these gadgets have its own importance, limiting its
usage
 in public place need to be considered. On the one side of the argument, those who support talking on cell phones think that
this
 cannot be bracketed as an unhealthy practise.
This
 is because these conversations are vital to share information with one another, that cannot be compared as smoking.
Furthermore
, smoking is injurious to health, not only to active smokers, but
also
 harmful to passive smokers as well,
that is
 not the case with having a conversation over the phone. Apart from
this
, another point here to consider that what is the purpose of a call,
may be
by chance
maybe
that is
 the for seeking the help of a needy person. Without picking the call, nobody can predict whether the call has any significance or not.
However
, I strongly believe that the excessive
usage
 of these mobile phones may be irritated by others, especially if they speaking to someone in a prayer meeting or hospital.
This
 often disturbs others as they may be having some worries in their mind.
Therefore
, it is better to avoid
such
 interaction in a public place unless it is an urgent one. Talking and laughing loudly may hurt others feeling, later on,
this
 can have friction between members of the particular group. In conclusion, even though people often support the
usage
 of mobiles in public place, opponents feel that
this
 is an unnecessary act, I, personally, think that the latters' view is accurate.
Submitted by Sal on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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