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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Internet crime is increasing rapidly as more and more people are using internet to make financial transactions. What can be done to tackle this problem?

#internet #crime #people #transactions
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Nowadays, the invention of the Internet has widely applied to people's daily life in different fields and stimulated the evolution of
information
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 distribution.
However
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, with the introduction of the Internet, cybercrime is growing at a dramatic speed,
this
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 could seriously damage nation's life security and property health.
This
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 essay will discuss and explore measures to deal with those issues.
Firstly
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, individuals should be sensitive about their personal
information
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 which distribute on social media or any communication applications.
For example
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, some people may share their passwords of bank account, or current addresses to their families or friends during conversation, so that hackers could have opportunities to chase those victims' accounts to gain those
information
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 for illegal usage. Unless people fully aware those messages they send, online criminals could reduce one of the channels for cybercrime implementation.
Secondly
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, some of hackers may implement their crime through website errors of commercial banks. Many management of these banks always overlook the security of online payment systems by lacking of the action plan on keeping update website safety levels and hire the experts from IT industry for
further
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 protection.
For example
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, cyber criminals could frequently use flaws or defects to access bank official websites to steal users'
information
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 or money transactions illegally.
As a result
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, customers sustain a huge amount of losses, and banks could suffer from the crisis of trust.
Hence
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, as website owners, commercial bank should take responsibilities to maintain safe dealing environment of by fully update softwares and hardwares for security level development. In conclusion, it is an inevitable trend that businessmen or companies trade with their clients on the Internet. I believed that individuals and bankers could strike those criminals by their actions to reduce financial damages.
Submitted by Ben on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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