success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success ? what makes a successful person.

#success #wealth #belongings #measure #person

In today's materialistic world, it is commonly believed that prosperity and material possessions are the criteria of a achieved

life

This

essay will consider whether being prosperous really is the best indicator of achievement, or whether there are other factors which contribute to a

person

being accomplished. While many people consider that wealth is the sign of success,

However I

Accept comma addition

However, I

strongly disagree with

this

viewpoint.

This

is because, Personally, being a achieved

person

means being happy in both personal and professional

life

Suggestion

lives

Accept space

while money is unable to bring true happiness to human

life

For example

Accept space

person

who lives in a luxury mansion, drive a pricey car, wear brand name clothes cannot guarantee that all of them are leading

Suggestion

enjoyable

life

. They might have a complicated conflict with their family member or suffer from their fatal illness.

Therefore

, it is obviously rich is not the indicated factor that

person

Suggestion

a person

people

would have a happy or successful

life

. According to scientific study say that it comprises of many elements, including strong relationship, a good health and having a specific goal.These things enable to motivate a

person

reaching their

life

objective

Accept space

For instance

, a businessman with passionate for running a clean food restaurant, he has a specific goal to provide healthy options for customers. To ensure that he would success in his business, he must have support from their family, friends and customer.

Furthermore

this

man must be in good health condition in order to deal with enormous barriers during his accomplished journey. In conclusion

Accept space

wealth is not the best measure of success, since a wealthy not guaranteed happiness in

life

. In my opinion, to lead

Suggestion

enjoyable and accomplished

life

Accept space

people should place an importance on building relationships, cultivating healthy habits and identifying their real aim.

Submitted by lelaythongdala on Thu Aug 13 2020

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

298 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success ? what makes a successful person.

Your opinion

nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for companies and organization.

In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

It is generally seen that most working people do not do enough physical exercise What are the reasons behind this? How can this problem be solved?

Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities while others think that it depends on other factors. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it?