Some people think that a sense of competition should be encouraged in children. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Competition has been cited as an indispensable factor
with
Suggestion
in
the non-stop development among individuals including young learners. While others contend that cooperation will promote children’s progress, I am in favour of competition in preference
to
Suggestion
for
collaboration
that is
Linking Words
likely to bring success to offsprings. On the one hand, competitive factors are advantageous to learners in terms of academic results and future career prospects. Concerning learners’ performance, competing within a class is the main driver that encourages children to bury themselves in their books.
As a result
Linking Words
, students’ progress will be improved, leading to achieving higher marks in various subjects.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, studying in a completely competitive environment is likely to form a continuous education habit after graduation.
This
Linking Words
will provide competitors with an opportunity of moving up the ladder in their future career.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some advocates of collaboration among children believe that cooperation will play an important role in evolving teamwork skills.
In other words
Linking Words
, group work activities will facilitate children to support each other in a variety of challenging tasks that cannot be addressed by an individual.
However
Linking Words
, cooperative activities
also
Linking Words
trigger a plethora of unanticipated problems
such
Linking Words
as excessive dependence on others and lack of decision making. Take less competent learners as a prime example, these students tend to excessively depend on outstanding ones in group writing tasks due to their limited competency.
Consequently
Linking Words
, independent skills of less outstanding learners will be hindered from being developed, contributing to their sluggish progress at school. In conclusion, it is undeniable that cooperation is essential to children’s development in light of its benefits;
however
Linking Words
, a competitive environment is more imperative for students to achieve success.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: