Many people believe that celebrities are having a negative impact on children. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Many believe that celebrities adversely influence the younger generation, while others do not agree to it. I,
however agree
Accept comma addition
however, agree
with the statement and believe that the young minds are at an impressionable age, and may be impacted by the lifestyle of these popular figures. All around the world, people look up to the celebrities as icons, and are interested to know about their lifestyle, house, routine. Unfortunately, what media does portray is the parties they attend and their foreign luxurious trips,
instead
of the hard work they put in to achieve their goals.
As a result
of
this
, a completely different impression is created in the minds of children and it leads them into thinking that life is all about parties and no hard-work.
Additionally
, many of the
influencers
a power to affect persons or events especially power based on prestige etc
influences
are clicked consuming alcohol or smoking cigarettes which makes the children want to imitate them. A survey carried out by FDA conveyed that 40% of children who tried drugs, alcohol were inspired by their favourite actress/actor/sports person and thought it was cool to do so. Not just
this
, celebrities
also
create an unrealistic beauty standard for their viewers. They post near perfect pictures on social media, along with skinny physique. As a consequence of which, people try to lose weight by unhealthy manner and may
also
develop anorexia nervosa.
Moreover
, many people are seen to be unhappy because of their physique, or looks. Many of these people,
also
undergo surgical reconstruction to look perfect and send out a message to do the same. The most prominent instance of
this
would be the Jenner sisters, who have a massive social media following. I strongly believe that children should be made comfortable in their own skin and made to derive their confidence with the way they think and not by the way they look. In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that these unreal beauty and lifestyle standards set up my celebrities should not bring down the confidence of children. They should be taught to be kind, generous and learned.
Submitted by aakshika29 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: