IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Organized tours to remote areas and community is increasingly popular. Is it a positive or negative development for the local people and the environment?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that the number of visitors to remote areas is growing. Generally,
this
Linking Words
 trend has both positive and negative consequences for not only the local inhabitants but
also
Linking Words
 the
environment
Use synonyms
. On the positive side, developed tourism always creates more employment opportunities for the local workforce. More
people
Use synonyms
 are likely to find work in hotels, restaurants and other tourist service providers in these tourist destinations. Local residents can
also
Linking Words
 sell souvenirs and local products
such
Linking Words
 as traditional food and clothes to visitors, and
this
Linking Words
 can help improve the living standards in these communities.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in order to attract more tourists who are interested in exploring the wild, the authorities of these areas have to invest in preserving the
environment
Use synonyms
 and
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 rich biodiversity so that visitors can enjoy the experience.
However
Linking Words
, the fact that tourism can disturb the lives of local
people
Use synonyms
 and the
environment
Use synonyms
 should be considered.
For example
Linking Words
, in many highly religious places, inappropriate behaviour
due to
Linking Words
 tourists’ lack of cultural understanding may offend
people
Use synonyms
 living in these areas, causing great tension and conflicts. In terms of
environmental
Correct article usage
the environmental
show examples
 impacts of tourism, there are a number of occasions where tourists thoughtlessly throw garbage into rivers and forests.
This
Linking Words
, unfortunately, has a severe effect on wildlife which will have to live in a polluted habitat and
leads
Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
show examples
 to some other environmental problems. In conclusion, an increase in the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who are interested in visiting remote communities is both advantageous and disadvantageous to
people
Use synonyms
 in these communities
as well as
Linking Words
 the local
environment
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on specific examples to strengthen the argument. For instance, mention specific remote locations or communities that have experienced both positive and negative impacts from tourism.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses clearly on one main idea and develops it thoroughly. Some ideas could be explored in more depth to provide a rounded discussion.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by discussing both positive and negative impacts of tourism on remote areas.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clearly stated, helping to frame the essay well.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas supports readability and comprehension of the main arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: