IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that a county becomes more interesting and develops faster when its population includes a mixture of different nationalities and cultures. Do you agree or disagree ?

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In recent years, whether a rich diversity of nationalities and cultures can lead to an appealing and well-developed
country
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 is a controversial issue. In my opinion, I completely agree that absorbing international elements helps improve the
development
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 of a
country
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 in different fields. It is imperative to note that a mixture of people who have various backgrounds can add interest and fun to a society. With different life experiences and cultures, people are likely to find it reinvigorating to live in
this
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country
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 because they can meet people from every corner of the
world
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.
For example
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, listening to novel life stories from others in a club or sharing different thoughts on an academic topic with international students in a class will expand one’s horizons as well as increase their love
to
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of
with
this
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 place. In the meantime,
this
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 mixing
country
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 can contribute to its fast
development
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 in different aspects.
Firstly
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,
such
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 an environment enables the arts to flourish because of the influx of cultures and religions.
In addition
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, artists will acquire a sense of inspiration from
this
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 artistry context and
thus
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 create valuable masterpieces of the
world
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.
Secondly
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, a growth in international companies leads to more business trades among the
world
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 which boosts the
development
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 of the economy. To conclude, absorbing people from different parts of the
world
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 can make
this
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country
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 more attractive because it provides a platform for people to make new friends.
Furthermore
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, it is essential to the
development
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 of
arts
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the arts
 and
economy
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the economy
, creating fortunes for
this
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 society.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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