The pie charts provide information about the proportion of three kind of nutrients included in common meals in the USA. These nutrients might be harmful when eaten pretty often.

#information #proportion #three #nutrients #meals #usa

The pie charts provide information about the proportion of three

kind

Change to a plural noun

kinds

show examples

nutrients

included in common meals in the USA. These

nutrients

might be harmful when eaten pretty often.

Overall

, the greatest proportion of

nutrients

are eaten during dinner, it includes,

sodium

, saturated fat and

sugar

Whereas

for breakfast

people

eat the lowest percentages of

nutrients

. The highest percentage of

sugar

is presented in snacks. During dinner,

people

eat 43% of

sodium

which is the largest fraction eaten compared with the other

nutrients

This

figure is followed by the saturated fat that accounted for 37% of the nutrient consumed

Change preposition

show examples

dinner.

Also

, during the lunch meal,

people

eat 29% of

sodium

and 26% of saturated fat.

However

, when it comes to

people

eating snacks, almost half of the

nutrients

eaten are added

sugar

and only 14% of

sodium

. For breakfast,

people

eat the lowest fraction of

nutrients

overall

, they only eat 14% of

sodium

, and the same amount of saturated fat and added

sugar

with 16%.

Submitted by juansetirado on Sat Aug 29 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words nutrients, sodium, sugar, people with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "provide" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

166 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

proportion
nutrients
common meals
harmful
frequently
overview
comparison
prevalent
potential health risks
obesity
diabetes
tooth decay
sodium content
high blood pressure
kidney issues
healthier meal options
modifications
public health implications
dietary habits
consumption
excessive
analysis
inspection

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The pie charts provide information about the proportion of three kind of nutrients included in common meals in the USA. These nutrients might be harmful when eaten pretty often.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Its is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

It has been suggested that primary school children should be taught how to grow vegetables and keep animals. To what extent the advantages outweigh its disadvantages.

some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects.others believe it is more importantto give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification