Some people believe arts such as painting and music cannot directly improve the quality of people's lives so that government money should be spent on other things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #arts #music #quality #lives #government #money

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India is a diverse

country

Use synonyms

and fine arts and music has been part of cultures from the ancient time. Few of masses believe that

such

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creativity and talent could not enhance the standard of living of people.

However

Linking Words

, they think that

such

Linking Words

money should be given to several other areas. I totally

agrees

Change the verb form

agree

with

this

Linking Words

notion,

this

Linking Words

is not

Add an article

the

perfect area to be focused there are quite

Change the article

few other

such

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as education and healthcare.

To begin

Linking Words

with, From

Add an article

the

past couple of decades globalisation emerging rapidly,

as a result

Linking Words

, people need to all basic amenities to survive in

this

Linking Words

competitive world. To spending monetary finance on some cultural aspects

such

Linking Words

as arts and music would not be rational,

instead

Linking Words

administration should provide assistant in

Remove the space

apply

education and healthcare, which as most vital aspects for improving

Add an article

the

standard of public as well as

economy

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, healthy and educated people could be given a proper contribution to the development of the

economy

Use synonyms

, which is far away for ill and unhealthy masses.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, It is

also

Linking Words

significant to preserve

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apply

traditional and cultural aspects which represent the

country

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, that how it was in past and how development took place. Apart from

this

Linking Words

, Through maintaining historical things

such

Linking Words

as painting and traditional culture things,

Use synonyms

Add an article

the

country could earn

Remove the space

apply

money through visitors around the

word

Correct your spelling

world

, as people always love to explore things that have some ancient story. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, a painting od Picasso was visited by millions of tourist around

Remove the space

apply

every corner of the world due to its story behind the sketch, Despite

this

Linking Words

, it was sold in about

million

Correct your spelling

millions

of dollars, which make

Use synonyms

Add an article

the

economy to earning huge amount from

such

Linking Words

cultural things. To conclude

this

Linking Words

, it is good to preserve old music and paint and spend

Remove the space

apply

huge money to preserve them.

However

Linking Words

, I agree with that,

Use synonyms

Add an article

the

country should spend more on basic amenities

such

Linking Words

as education and healthcare facilities, as it directly contributes to the

economy

Use synonyms

and enhances the standard of life.

Submitted by asifrathod662 on Wed Sep 02 2020

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

328 words

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Some people believe arts such as painting and music cannot directly improve the quality of people's lives so that government money should be spent on other things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people buy new models of phones, computers and other technology immidatey and other prefer to buy after a while which launch. discuss both views and give your opinion.

The increasing availability of low-cost airlines now lets people travel around the world. Some feel this is a positive development while others think it is negative overall. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their freetime. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that younger generations can learn a lot about how to be good members of society from older generations. Others think it is better for younger people to get advice on how to be a good citizen from their peers. Discuss both views and give your opinion.