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Band 6.5

Many students are taught to push themselves to try and be better than other students, rather than work together for everyone's benefits. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

#students #work
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Everyone does not agree with the fact that students can build a better future by working together.
Thus
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, some people strongly believe that students should be self-motivated to become better individuals than others. As a strong believer of the adage - "Together we stand divided we fall", I agree with the former statement.
However
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, we will discuss both the perspectives in
this
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 essay. People feel that students should learn to push themselves to compete with others to be better human beings, as
this
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 attitude will help them in the long run and motivates them to think out of the box.
For instance
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, Harvard University research confirms that self-learned habits are hard to be forgotten like waking-up early, punctuality, respecting elders etc., When these habits are taught by parents from early childhood, it is hard for the youngsters to change them.
However
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, these kids will have a hard time to mingle and accept others as they are not used to
this
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.
In contrast
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, some people believe that working together with other students can benefit both, as it enhances sharing and caring for each other.
Further
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,
this
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 will help the young generations to stay united and learn from other's mistake.
For example
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, students who are exposed to boarding school will have the tendency to accept fellow students well than the day-scholars because they spend ample amount of time with each other and are exposed to students with varying cultural and economic backgrounds. In conclusion, students working together in creating a promising future helps both the individuals and society
thus
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 outweighs the benefits of them pushing themselves to be better.
Submitted by Srinithi Ramesh on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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