IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

THERE IS GROWING EVIDENCE THAT MAN-MADE ACTIVITIES ARE MAKING GLOBAL TEMPERATURES HIGHER. WHAT ARE THE CAUSES OF TEMPERATURES RISING? HOW SHOULD WE DEAL WITH THIS PROBLEM?

#evidence #activities #temperatures
Scientists have enough data to support that human activities are worsening global warming. In
this
 essay, I will explain the causes of
this
 increase in earth’s temperature and how can humanity cope with
this
 problem. Looking at the reasons why Earth is heating, pollution is a major contributor, especially that from carbon dioxide or CO2. While
this
 gas, under natural circumstances, is not so dangerous to living beings, the extreme concentration in which some industrial activities launch it on the atmosphere is particularly concerning. Higher concentrations of CO2 in the air impede heat to leave the planet to space, so the surface of Earth becomes warmer.
Moreover
, the growth in cattle breeding all over the world is worsening the situation, since these animals expel large amounts of methane – another poisoning gas in certain quantities.
However
, there are some simple measures that can be taken to address these issues.
First
 and foremost, abandoning the burnt of fossil fuels is known to help decrease the intensity of CO2 in the atmosphere, which has immediate effects on reducing global temperatures. Given that, people should shift their use of energy to renewable sources, like wind-powered systems.
Second
, dealing with the problem of cattle is not impossible, since numerous other sources of proteins can be found in plants that not only do not emit methane but help to increase the oxygen in the atmosphere through photosynthesis. In conclusion, air pollution is regarded as the greatest contributor to the excess of poisoning gases in the air, which leads to an increase in the planet’s temperature.
Nonetheless
, some measures can be taken to cope with these issues,
such
 as using more eco-friendly sources of energy and eating less meat.
Submitted by lucas99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: