In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

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There is no doubt that
l
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the

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ongevity of human has been improved these days since the medical field is developing.
However
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, due to
this
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,
a
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the

It appears that an article is missing before the word ageing. Consider adding the article.

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geing population may cause financial strain to the economy of their native country.
This
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can be effectively controlled by increasing retirement
age
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. On the one hand, the elderly generation’s care requirements need a huge amount of nations’ capital. By allocating
such
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a big
chunck
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chunk

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money prevents the authority to channelize the fund to the development of other
much needed
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much-needed

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areas.
For instance
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,
upgradation
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up-gradation

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of
e
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the
an

The noun phrase educational system seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ducational system to meet the latest requirement of work sectors may not be possible as they do not have sufficient finance for
this
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. Eventually, the youth, the taxpayers, are forced to contribute their earnings to look after the older population.
This
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can
resulting
Change the verb form
result
be resulting

The verb resulting after the modal verb can does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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in poor growth of the country in a long run.
Nevertheless
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,
this
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problem can be controlled if the
age
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of retirement is increased. In
other word
Change the wording
another word
other words

The adjective other appears to be modifying the singular noun word. Consider making a change.

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, By doing
this
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, more older people would work and their
expertize
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expertise

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can be utilized,
Similarly
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, they can
also
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contribute to the economy by paying their taxes and they could, even, save some money for their
oldage
Correct your spelling
old age
old-age

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care.
As a result
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,
this
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would give a huge relief to the
youngsters
Change to a genitive case
youngster's
youngsters'

It appears that the word youngsters should use the genitive case. Consider changing the noun.

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taxes. Apart from
this
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, other areas can be flourished because they have been funded significantly.
For example
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, in the
uk
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UK

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, currently,
h
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a

The noun phrase healthy adult seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ealthy adult can work
upto
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up to

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65 years old, some times,even after that
age
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, if his or her health permits. In conclusion, the older generation can cause some difficulties
to
Verify preposition usage
in

It appears that the preposition to may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

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the economy of
develpoed
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developed

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countries, which can be resolved by allowing them to work even in their later
age
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
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