The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has transformed the way we live, communicate and do business. Mobile phones can also be the cause of social or medical problems. What forms do these problems take? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of mobile phones? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#phone #years #business #phones #forms

Cutting edge technology is part of our daily life. Of course, Mobile phone is one of the latest ones and it got accepted by everyone in

such

a way that, it has become an imperative part of our hand, and pocket now. Not only, proliferation in mobile

usage

made the

world

global village but

also

, transformed the way the entire planet works.

However

this

has raised some severe troubles in terms of psychological and physical problems in one’s life.

To begin

, the concept of a mobile phone being a gadget to just make calls and text messages

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is obsolete. Smartphones, that can connect with the internet and brings any information at our fingertips, whether it is relevant to physics, history, art, country, or finance.

This

, not only being able to access the data from the internet, but

also

provides a feature to use various apps, which allows users to connect with any part of the

world

, and shop .

Furthermore

, Online shopping is a booming industry and possess a gigantic opportunity to thrive a business. A typical example, Amazon is the biggest online shopping platform and it’s CEO Jeff Bezos, who holds a leading position in the richest people around the

world

. On the other side of a spectrum, the catastrophic effects of radiation spread through network

usage

are hazardous to the health.

Consequently

, there has been rapid growth in non-ionizing radiation in

Add an article

the

show examples

ast decade, which results in myriads of patients suffering from cancer, and brain tumour. Apart from medical afflict, financially sound mobile app companies like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp use various tactics to make everyone addictive to their app.

Such

results in being oblivion from the

world

, stress, depression, anxiety, and being socially deprived. To recapitulate, even though cell phone

usage

has certain drawbacks, perks in day to day life including connecting individual to the globe and providing business opportunities far outweigh demerits. So, limited

usage

with consciousness, avoiding distracting apps makes it one of the best technology ever existed.

Submitted by Nirbhay on Fri Sep 18 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

332 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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