In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#countries #people #health #food #government #tax

There are a lot of people who eat too much fast

food

. Fast

food

is not

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

healthy

food

. If people ate fast

food

too often, they would have gotten a health problem,

such

as hyperlipidemia, high blood pressure and obesity.

However

, I do not agree to increase

Add an article

the

show examples

ax on fast

food

. There are several reasons why I disagree with

this

topic.

First

, the reason why many people want to eat fast

food

because

Replace the word

that

show examples

cheap. Usually

Add a comma

show examples

people who get those kinds of

food

are students or homeless people. They don't have enough money to go to a fancy restaurant.

Second

, a boundary condition of fast

food

is not obvious. What kinds of

food

are

Change the verb form

show examples

fast

food

and what kinds of

food

are healthy

food

? If

Add an article

the

show examples

overnment wants to

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

tax for fast

food

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

than

Replace the word

then

show examples

they have to figure out what real fast

food

is.

Last

, actually fast

food

is not

Change the article

the

show examples

only reason that

cause

Change the verb form

causes

show examples

diseases. According to some experts, hamburger-representative fast

food

- has all kinds of nutriment. The thing that makes fast

food

Remove the article

apply

show examples

junk

food

the

Change the article

show examples

soda like coke, juice, and sprite.

Submitted by Hailey Ryu on Thu Oct 01 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

187 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Overconsumption
Chronic diseases
Obesity
Diabetes
Cardiovascular health
Sin tax
Subsidize
Affordability
Nutritional awareness
Paternalism
Socio-economic disparities
Industry lobbying
Public health initiatives
Consumer behavior
Regulatory measures
Health-conscious
Processed foods
Fiscal policy
Preventative healthcare
Behavioral economics

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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

People today are more concerned with owning material possessions than with developing friendships and family relationships. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Some think college is best for career preparation, while others prefer gaining work experience early. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.