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Band 3.5

some people say that in all level of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #level #education #schools #universities #time #facts #skills
Education plays a vital role in individual life.
And it
Correct word choice
It
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 is often argued by some experts that educational institutes spend more time on theoretical rather than practical assessment.
This
 essay agrees with
this
 notion that learning centres are not giving much importance to practical abilities and
further
highlight
Correct subject-verb agreement
highlights
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 the factors.
Firstly
, it is quite evident that nowadays competition is more among the
students
 and educational academies are more focussed on theory subjects and not much-giving importance to hands-on experience.
Due to
this
,
students
are lacking with
Wrong verb form
lack
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 cognitive skills and face failure at the international level exams.
For example
, AIIMS is a competitive exam and it has different modules to pass and the majority of
students
 failed in the practical section.
Therefore
,
students
 did not get admission
in
Change preposition
to
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 top universities.
Secondly
, the education system is not upgraded.
In other words
, Institutes did not have feasible labs and experts for particular subjects, where pupils
can
Wrong verb form
could
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 have a better understanding of the courses they are studying.
For instance
, in India, there are many schools where one teacher is educating multiple subjects and
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
teachers
Add a comma
teachers,
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 no real sessions
took
Wrong verb form
take
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 place and schools lack
with
Change preposition
apply
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practical types of equipment
as a result
, only verbal education is given.
To conclude
,the lack of proper tools and professors can be viable reasons that children are
depriving
Wrong verb form
deprived
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 of live tests.
Also
, because of more competition schools are preparing children to pass
overall
 in spite of lab tests.
Submitted by minhas.jaspreet333 on

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task response
Your essay provides a basic response to the task. Make sure to address all aspects of the topic and present a clear argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has some logical progression and linking of ideas, but there are areas where the connection between ideas is not clear. Try to use more cohesive devices to link your ideas together.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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