You want to apply to a private college seeking admission for a bachelor degree. You are experiencing financial problems at the moment and can not get admitted to the college without some help. Write a letter to the Principal of the college explaining your situation and ask for information on scholarships or other means of financial help available.

#college #admission #bachelor #moment #help #situation #information #scholarships

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Dear Sir, I am Harvey Spectar, and I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to show my

interested

Replace the word

interest

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to enrol in a bachelor of

Correct article usage

apply

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engineering degree program at your college.

However

Linking Words

, I am in dilemma to apply or not as I am facing financial difficulties currently.

To begin

Linking Words

with, I have outstanding high school grades

Change preposition

of 98

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% which is above

than

Change preposition

apply

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the criteria mentioned in the offered course.

Moreover

Linking Words

, I have worked day and night to prepare for the application at your

university

Use synonyms

including essay and recommendation letter submission.

Although

Linking Words

I am a perfect match, I am hesitant to make

Linking Words

further

Add an article

a further

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move

Fix the agreement mistake

moves

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. My aunt was sick. So, I had to use my savings for her medicine and hospitalization bill settlement. I would like to know

that is

Linking Words

there any option for me to get financial help from the

university

Use synonyms

. As your

university

Use synonyms

is well known, I am sure there must be a scholarship program for needy students; I would like to enquire about it and know my eligibility.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, I would like to assure you that if I get aid from

Use synonyms

university

Add an article

the university

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, I will never disappoint with my grade by working hard to be

Change preposition

show examples

the topper list. Yours sincerely, Harvey

Spectar

Correct your spelling

Spectre

Submitted by Nirbhay on Wed Oct 14 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

200 words

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