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Band 7

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operation rather than compete became useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #sense #competition #children #co-operation #adults
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In
this
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 contemporary era, the world is changing rapidly and dramatically. Nowadays, children have more immense pressures from their parents to complete the child
next
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 door. So, some people think that sense of co-operation must be inclined in them, whereas others argue that a sense of
competition
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 is more beneficial. I totally agree with the latter view.
First
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 and foremost,
competition
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 is a part of daily life and without it, we cannot survive in
this
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 world.
Also
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, infants must develop important skills through the
competition
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. It builds confidence in them, which can be useful for their later life.
For example
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, if they compete with themselves and others,
then
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 they would be better than they in the past, because of it they can able to achieve what they want. They have a clear and keen vision of the goal.
In addition
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 to the above, another advantage is they always aim high and to achieve that they set benchmarks. In those times, they never make excuses to work hard.
Moreover
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, their focus is clear. Anytime they do their work, they fully dedicated to a task. It helps individuals to excel well in society. They would know their abilities very well.
On the other hand
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, a human is a social animal. They cannot be remained isolated for a long time. Socialism is important to develop good relationships with others. It, not only develops selflessness, in which the person thinks about society and others before himself but
also
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 develops brotherhood as well. Owing to
this
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, the person develops emotional connections with people and they turn into a gentleman. To conclude,
competition
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 makes the man perfect. The infants would turn into obedient and good citizens of any nation. The pros outweigh the cons.
Submitted by Harvey on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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