IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that children should always ask for their parent’s advice while others feel this is not important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #parent’s #advice
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As everyone knows, these days, because of various factors, children are likely to have many problems, and some people think that they need to ask their parents for the solutions.
However
, I would like to argue that the kids could receive the information from others not just only from their parents.
Therefore
, I partly disagree with
this
 statement for several reasons that will explain in the following paragraphs.
First
 and foremost, according to the Thai belief, Thai people think that parents are their
first
 teachers who teach them everything since they are born. Actually, in my perspective as a Thai, I really believe that and I would say that every parent wants their kids to be a good person so, they will definitely give the practical suggestion for sure.
On the other hand
, in fact, the kids and the parents grew up in different periods of time so,
this
 could bring some dissimilar thought and lead to arguments between family.
Nevertheless
, sometimes, it could be better, especially for adolescents to ask for some advice from their friends or cousins.
As a result
 of they all have an equal age and
this
 makes they might think that their peers and cousin would be able to understand them more. To sum up, some people believe that if children did not get suggestions from their parents, the information will harm the children's life.
However
, whether the suggestion that they receive is in what way, it is the kid's decision and they will learn how to handle it with themselves.
Moreover
, receiving others' advice may make young people feel more comfortable.
Submitted by fahsai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: