For schoolchildren, their teachers have more influence on their intelligence and social development than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Educating a child has never been an easy task for any
partners
Fix the agreement mistake
partner
show examples
or teacher. Some people assert that
parents
play a role when it comes to cultivating their intelligence education and social skills than the instructor,
while
others believe that schools are more suited to handle
this
task. Admittedly, Experts shows that lecturer could justify that
teachers
exert a noticeable effect on those who are in the formative years in terms of social skills and intellectual
development
. For a start, as for students, since the majority of their time is spent in the classroom, thereby,
teachers
will exert a subtle influence on their cultivation of study habits or learning methods.
Further
teachers
usually excel in professional knowledge,summarize the core of knowledge and have a deepening insight into the common sense of education,
thus
,they can help students excel academically. Despite
this
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
it is unjustified
Fix the infinitive
to
show examples
believe that
parents
have no duty to educate child sociability and academic performance. First,
parents
, in most cases, know better about their children and are instinctively willing to devote their love to the
development
of their children. In
this
sense, some talented or knowledgeable
parents
could successfully help children achieve more in academic study.
Also
, every parent will educate their child to respect the old and unite their peers. In light of
this
statement,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
parents
impose a marked effect on their adolescent social
development
. Ultimately, my view is that under no circumstances can we ignore the indispensable roles
parents
could play in their
development
. Virtually, both
teachers
and educators exert a profound influence on one’s intelligence and social skills.
However
, once schooling starts,
teachers
will have more influence.
Submitted by 1339232976 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: