IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

For schoolchildren, their teachers have more influence on their intelligence and social development than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#schoolchildren #teachers #influence #intelligence #development #parents
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The
development
Use synonyms
 of children is now a topic of the whole society. Do you think children are going to
school
Use synonyms
, teachers In terms of intelligence and social
development
Use synonyms
, the impact will be on their parents. I think the teacher may be in the face of wisdom children have more
influence
Use synonyms
 on children, but parents have more
influence
Use synonyms
 on children in social skills
development
Use synonyms
. Indeed, we admit that professional teachers can benefit children a lot.
that is
Linking Words
 because they know how to educate children of
this
Linking Words
 age and tell them about their major earning method (intellectual). In comparison,
although
Linking Words
 parents
also
Linking Words
 know the basic knowledge, It's very difficult for them to teach knowledge. What's more, many parents don't have good grades, so the teachers are there the
influence
Use synonyms
 of the intellectual side.
However
Linking Words
, even if the child enters the
school
Use synonyms
, I feel that the
influence
Use synonyms
 of parents on social practice is even greater.
first
Linking Words
 parents have more
time
Use synonyms
 to
influence
Use synonyms
 their children's social
development
Use synonyms
. In primary
school
Use synonyms
, learning is in
school
Use synonyms
 The
time
Use synonyms
 is not as long as other grades,
that is
Linking Words
 to say, parents can spend a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 with their children. althoughTeachers can
also
Linking Words
 use professional skills to teach children social
development
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as how to deal with affairs respect the old and love the young + unite and cooperate. But
this
Linking Words
 kind of thing is not like knowledge point, it needs to learn in practice. It is not enough
time
Use synonyms
 to practice in
school
Use synonyms
 alone. parents have a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 to take their children with them after
school
Use synonyms
 to improve these skills.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the teacher's
influence
Use synonyms
 on primary
school
Use synonyms
's intelligence and parents'
influence
Use synonyms
 on children's social skills
Submitted by 1339232976 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: