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Writing Samples
Band 7

Children should take part time job in their free time or they should totally focus on their studies. What are the advantages and disadvantages to children of doing so?

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The practice of working after college hours is progressively increasing among a few teenagers. It is generally believed that these young people are even supported by their parents.
Although
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 working in spare time may help them in gaining confidence and in building a career, later in their
life
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,
this
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 trend, certainly, has some obvious drawbacks.
This
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 essay will discuss both pros and cons of
this
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 modern development. A
job
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 – be it part-time or a full-time – offers lots of benefits to an individual.
Firstly
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, it develops confidence in a person, which in turn helps to enhance different skills
such
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 as communication skill, problem-solving, discipline and planning. By acquiring these skills at an early stage of
life
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, a juvenile can become a responsible adult.
Furthermore
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, a part-time
job
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 is a great opportunity to enhance career prospects.
For instance
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, if a youngster is already experienced professionally, he will be able to achieve a well deserving
job
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 with ease.
Thus
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, a spare-time
job
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 can actually provide a person with numerous rewards,
subsequently
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.
However
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, students who choose to take a
job
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 after college hours are at many distinct disadvantages.
First
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 and foremost, these jobs can only be done in the evening;
hence
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, a child will be unable to get proper rest, which is highly essential for his mental wellness.
Secondly
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, he will not be able to spend quality time with his parents and friends which is important for social growth.
In addition
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, working,
instead
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 of studying, in free time will adversely affect his educational performance.
Finally
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, physical activity which plays a vital role in
p
Add an article
the
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hysical well-being of a person will be ignored.
Hence
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,
this
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 decision to work can be more of a hindrance than a help. In conclusion, engaging a teenager in a spare-time
job
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 may reward him with certain skills, making him extremely efficient;
however
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, it can have detrimental impacts on their health, academic performance and social
life
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. On balance, I believe parents should not exhort their children to work while studying as children deserve to enjoy their
life
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 to the fullest when they are still young.
Therefore
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, before making a decision, both parents and children should think wisely.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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