It is sometimes said that ‘travel broadens the mind’. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#‘travel #mind’

Some people believe that travel makes our

mind

widely. I completely agree with

this

statement and will give reasons below.

First

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

can give us various and new experiences that we have not known for our whole life. Let's say you are a westerner who lives in Europe. You would feel everything familiar around you

such

as cultural traits, traditions, religion but when you travel to Asia, you will see everything is different.

Traveling

Change the spelling

Travelling

show examples

is a good way to learn new things. Learning new things can always make us have rich knowledge. I think

this

can support travel makes our

mind

broadly.

Second

, Taking a break is significant as well in our life. We can get our

broaded

Correct your spelling

broad

broadened

mind

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

nature

For instance

, It doesn't feel refreshment in the city how much time we have as a rest.

For example

, Imagine

about

Verify preposition usage

apply

show examples

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

nature

Add an article

show examples

ountain, river, sea. There is no other sounds but birds or water. I believe everyone has the memory of staying in

the

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apply

show examples

nature

This

gives us

Add an article

show examples

eaceful

mind

. When we have space in our

mind

, we can think something more clearly and

think

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thinks

show examples

more widely than before. I can tell

this

reason

also

helps to say that our

mind

broaded

Correct your spelling

broadened

broad

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

. In conclusion, there are two reasons why I think our

mind

could be

broaded

Correct your spelling

broadened

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

First

one is our

mind

can be widely learning from other country's traits through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

and

Change the article

the

show examples

econd one is going to

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

nature

can give us the peaceful

mind

that can give space in our

mind

make us think widely.

Submitted by ieltsirene on Thu Nov 26 2020

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is sometimes said that ‘travel broadens the mind’. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages of this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Many parents today do not spend much time with their children. Why is this? Does this affect parents or children more?

Recent reserch suggests that the majority of criminals who are sent to prison commit crimes after they are released. Why is this the case? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some people think that government should not spend money on sports stadium and building theatres. Instead it should spend more money on education. Do you gree or disgree?