It is sometimes said that ‘travel broadens the mind’. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Some people believe that travel makes our

mind

Use synonyms

widely. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

statement and will give reasons below.

First

Linking Words

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

can give us various and new experiences that we have not known for our whole life. Let's say you are a westerner who lives in Europe. You would feel everything familiar around you

such

Linking Words

as cultural traits, traditions, religion but when you travel to Asia, you will see everything is different.

Traveling

Change the spelling

Travelling

show examples

is a good way to learn new things. Learning new things can always make us have rich knowledge. I think

this

Linking Words

can support travel makes our

mind

Use synonyms

broadly.

Second

Linking Words

, Taking a break is significant as well in our life. We can get our

broaded

Correct your spelling

broad

broadened

mind

Use synonyms

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, It doesn't feel refreshment in the city how much time we have as a rest.

For example

Linking Words

, Imagine

about

Verify preposition usage

apply

show examples

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

Add an article

show examples

ountain, river, sea. There is no other sounds but birds or water. I believe everyone has the memory of staying in

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

gives us

Add an article

show examples

eaceful

mind

Use synonyms

. When we have space in our

mind

Use synonyms

, we can think something more clearly and

think

Change the verb form

thinks

show examples

more widely than before. I can tell

this

Linking Words

reason

also

Linking Words

helps to say that our

mind

Use synonyms

broaded

Correct your spelling

broadened

broad

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

. In conclusion, there are two reasons why I think our

mind

Use synonyms

could be

broaded

Correct your spelling

broadened

through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

First

Linking Words

one is our

mind

Use synonyms

can be widely learning from other country's traits through

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

and

Linking Words

Change the article

the

show examples

econd one is going to

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

nature

Use synonyms

can give us the peaceful

mind

Use synonyms

that can give space in our

mind

Use synonyms

make us think widely.

ieltsirene

Nov 26, 2020

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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